Category: Home Life

Some people buy houses,
While others pay rent;
Some like an apartment;
Still others a tent.

But those kinds are lucky–
The whole world is filled
With suckers like we folks
Who just have to BUILD.

Then it’s floor plan and closets;
It’s choose the right spot;
It’s windows and curtains,
And basement or not?

It’s how shall we heat it;
Will the fireplace trap snow?
What sort of exterior- –
And where find the dough?

So when she thumbs a magazine,
Looking perplexed,
Unless you’re quite agile,
You seem to be next!

by Ray Romine Wednesday, January 7, 1953

In the dark, my ardor cools
For furniture. It rankles
That they should term the things footstools
That catch me at the ankles.

by Ray Romine Saturday, October 20, 1951

The walls -well, now, I couldn’t say:
Blue or green or pink or gray?
By mixing, plus the salesman’s hints
You can get a thousand tints.
And draperies–this isn’t news–
Are difficult for me to choose.
It Is very hard to know just what
Would go well with the stuff we’ve got.
Deciding’s nasty; yet, my dear,
It might postpone this one more yearJ

by Ray Romine Sunday, September 21, 1952

My Sunday painting won’t, I fear,
Ever grace museum halls;
But anyway my daubing here
Is easier than painting walls!

by Ray Romine Monday, February 8, 1954

The
The kitchen radiator was knocking and pounding and shouting
and swearing; but when I asked the plumber if the valve could be fixed, he sadly answered, “I don’t see how.”
His disgusted look said, “Don’t you know this CAN’T be
FIXED?–I’ll go now.”

And postoffice people look positively exasperated because I don’t know the amt. of postage necessary to send a pkg. weighing 4 lbs., 3 oz. to Nome, Alaska;
If there were any other way of finding out, dear, old p. o. clerk, would I aska?

Would I, if I could plumb, call a plumber?
And hafta clean up his mess, and repair the woodwork, and pay his price, besides wait on the job all summer?

If I were as smart as those people think I should be, and
see my way through the mist,
How could they exist?

I wouldn’t need to call a plumber or have a sad-eyed clerk weigh my’parcel;
A few deft twists with-a wrench for the one; and, for the other, save that walk to the p.o, and my instep and
metatarsal.

We all the other guy, because he is dumber than we are,
upbraid–
Then, in the next breath, expect him to know EVERYTHING
about every line and trade…

And I guess the fellow who first said “It’s a funny world”, must have been doing of it some studying–
And if I had been examining, or knew anything at all about poetry, would I be doing this kind of fuddy-duddying?

by Ray Romine Sunday, April 18, 1943

I am a King, and quite, quite rich,
For in my six-room palace small
There lives a Queen–and that’s not all:
We have a Princess, –winsome witch!

Though just a little low in pitch,
And I lack plenty on the ball,
I am a King.

I’ve friends who’d give me their last stitch,
If need should be, and I should call.
No, I will never see the Hall
Of Fame; and yet in this, my niche,
I am a King.

(This form taken from “A Squirrel’s Realm, by Mary O’Connor,
in The Notebook, and taken from Ohio State Journal

by Ray Romine Wednesday, January 26, 1944

Let who will chortle, I’m aware
Of dust upon the upper stair;
I know I should. sew buttons on
That shirt which Don come dawn will don;
There is a cake I should be mixing;
That one venetian blind needs fixing;
The budgeting needs catching up;
The fish need food; so does the pup;
The wash needs sprinkling; kilds need soap
And a good scrub; and I need hope!
The floor needs wax; this rug is dirty,
And though there must be maybe thirty
Other jobs that you could mention,
TV needs–and gets–attention!

by Ray Romine Sunday, December 2, 1951

Now when we got married we fretted and fumed.
For we wanted a homey so bad.
This room and that room we struggled to fix
In keeping with each latest fad.

Lamps must be so and the poor radio
Suffered greatly from moving so much.
Furniture sighed as we earnestly tried
To make homey comfy and such.

All of this trouble we made for ourselves
And a sweet waste of time, too, by Gar!
All of this trouble to fix up our home,
And we spend half our time in the car.

by Ray Romine Saturday, September 23, 1933

Their brand-new home has each device
Designed to save a step or minute,
Except the front walk with its nice
S-curve with the detour in it.

by Ray Romine Friday, September 29, 1950

Dishes in the kitchen sink
Tend to grow instead of shrink .

by Ray Romine Monday, November 12, 1951